For me healing through the art and music is extremely helpful. Music was a large part of mine and Logan’s relationship. It might sound silly to you but having one another enjoy and appreciate our individual music tastes was a make or break for us. Something we both loved to do was make each other CD’s or playlists. We would always title them “Songs that ________” We would fill the blank with the theme of the playlist such as Songs that Remind Me of You or Songs that Make Me Feel Nostalgic. And then we would try to fill the playlist with about 10-20 songs but for each song we included, we would have to include a reason why we chose it. This is something I will always hold near and dear to my heart. I have continued creating playlists as a way to confront and deal with my feelings and emotions.
I follow the same pattern “Songs that Make me feel Angry” or “Songs that Remind me of the Crash”. Then I pick all of my songs and include reasons for why I chose each one. This has become extremely therapeutic for me and thought it might be therapeutic for any of you reading. Here is an example of a playlist that I actually use.
Songs that Make me Think Positively
1. Counting Blue Cars –Dishwalla
I chose this song because the singer talks about asking questions about God and refers to God as a woman. I’ve been struggling with my faith and this helps me process that God could exist outside of the God I always believed in previous to the crash.
2. Once in a Lifetime –Talking Heads
I chose this song because the singer continues to ask how they got to that point in their life but no matter what life keeps going on and you later down the road keep questioning how did I get here? I really identify with that.
3. Keep –Mother Mother
I chose this song because I always cry when I hear it because it’s extremely relatable. “I’ll keep breaking my heart until it opens again” “I’ll keep falling apart until I’m whole again” My heart keeps breaking but that is the only way for it to become whole again. It’s a calming reminder what I’m going through is normal.
4. Watch Me –Grey Reverend
I chose this song because the lyrics make me think that Logan is watching over me. He is seeing my good days and bad days. He is seeing how much I love him. He is watching over me and helping me in his own way loving me back.
5. Dreams –The Cranberries
I chose this song because I am constantly having vivd dreams and nightmares. But now my only way to see Logan is in my dreams and as the song says “my life is changing everyday but you’re a dream to me”.
6. Dreams –Fleetwood Mac
Fleetwood Mac always makes me think of Logan because he had a Fleetwood Mac CD in his car and we would listen to it over and over just singing our hearts out. This song is very calming to me and always brings a smile to my face.
7. The Long Way Around –Dixie Chicks
I chose this song because I can really relate to the girls that they were knocked down and have to find their own way, different from their friends by taking the long way to get where they need to be. If that isn’t my life I don’t know what is.
8. Electric Avenue –Eddy Grant
I have no deep meaning for choosing this song, it just always makes me feel happy and helps project me to have a good day.
9. The Boys Are Back In Town –Thin Lizzy
This song reminds me of all the good times I’ve had with my friends. My friends group is predominately boys so it’s very fitting for when we all come home and meet up in the summer.
10. Dream a Little Dream of Me –The Mamas & The Papas
I find this song very soothing and dreamy. I do have nightmares a lot but I sometimes listn to this song before I go to sleep and try to think positively about having good dreams like seeing Logan.
11. Lovers’ Carvings –Bibio
This song makes me feel bubbly and light. I find I am very pessitmistic about love and seeing other people in love because I’m jealous so this song is a nice reminder about how sweet love is.
12. Morning –Beck
This song is very relaxing and talks about finding the good in the midst of the bad. It’s great for easy listening and positive thinking.
13. Eyes – Rogue Wave
This song also has a very calming effect on me. There are a lot of inconvenient things that happen to me during the day but nothing will be ever as bad as losing Logan. Thinking about his eyes makes me happy. This song reminds me to put things in perspective.
14. Something Beautiful –Tim Halperin
I first heard this song as it was the background music to someone’s wedding video. It is about love but for me it reminds me that something beautiful or good is coming.
15. I Won’t Back Down –Tom Petty
I chose this song because it reminds me to be strong. Whatever life throws my way I still have to be strong and remain standing, even if I’m battling with myself.